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My dear daughter Bethany,

Your wedding day is almost here. I am so happy that you and Alex are getting married. He is a good man and I know that the two of you will be happy together. I am thrilled that you have chosen to share your life together. Your wedding is an important step on an amazing shared journey. As I watch you prepare for the occasion, I can’t help but feel nostalgic.

I can now properly identify with that lovely song from Fiddler on the Roof:

“Is this the little girl I carried?
Is this the little boy at play?
I don’t remember growing older
When did they?
When did she get to be a beauty?
When did he grow to be so tall?
Wasn’t it yesterday
When they were small?
Sunrise, sunset
Sunrise, sunset
Swiftly flow the days
Seedlings turn overnight to sunflowers
Blossoming even as we gaze.”

Later in the song Tevye asks: “What words of wisdom can I give them? How can I help to ease their way?” I ask myself the same question. I can’t let the occasion pass without offering a few words of advice as you start your marriage. After almost 28 years of marriage to your dad, I’ve learned some of the essentials. So here are a few suggestions from mom…

Be patient with one another.

Be kind.

Be generous.

Spend time together.

Challenge one another.

Assume the best.

Be quick to forgive.



Choose joy.

I pray that you will have deep joy in your marriage as your dad and I have had. When you traverse difficult days that will inevitably come along, I pray that you will support one another. I pray that your marriage will be an extraordinary synergy of two beautiful people who will give even more to the world together than you could by being apart.  Now and always, may you and Alex know love, joy and peace. I love you!


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Discussion - One Comment
  1. Aysha

    Jun 03, 2014  at 11:50 AM

    This really made me teary… Speaking from my soon to be 5 year wedding anniversary, the suggestions you made are absolutely key and it was a really good reminder for myself as well! Congratulations to your daughter :)


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